Updated: May 13, 2020
Hello! It's been a little while since I've blogged and written publicly, and so much has transpired since I last shared with you. To start, I learned that my mother was sick and within 3 weeks of finding out she was sick, she passed away. Although it seemed to be pretty quick, I'm thankful that I got to spend her last days with her, and she told me many times that she was glad I was there. Since discovering that she was sick, up until after she passed, I've been reflecting on so many different things. I just want to share with you what's been on my heart for the past month or so. Below are 10 things I've learned since finding out my mother was sick, and after she passed on. I believe they can apply to any relationship.
No matter what type of relationship you had with your mother, when she’s gone, you will miss her.
It’s OK to be wrong sometimes....even when you know you aren’t.
Pride takes a backseat when you know that the end is near.
It’s OK to grieve, it doesn’t have to be in public or on social media because it’s nobody’s business, and you don’t have to walk around with the “grieving face” so that other people believe that you’re still hurting. It’s still alright to smile in the midst of your pain..
Detach, reflect, and refresh as often as you need to, no explanation is required.
Don’t wait for imminent death to make things right with those you love....everyone may not have a “deathbed” experience, and you don’t want it to be said “it’s too late”. Fix it now while all parties are still breathing.
We all know this one....but forgiveness is for you...not them...forgive even if they don’t apologize. You are accountable for your part in the matter, which may only be forgiveness. They are responsible for their part and you can’t make them see their issue no matter how hard you try. Forgive, and keep it moving.
The actions of people will be remembered long after their words are forgotten.
Sometimes, people will never be to you, what you are to them. It may seem unfair, it may seem unbalanced, but just know someone needs you, and you can’t give up on them.
Finally....stop living in a bubble! Don’t isolate yourself from society. We are wired to be in relationships with people. Someone needs what you have to give, and whether you admit it or not, you also need what someone else has to give!
I hope this helps someone to refocus on the importance of forgiveness and relationships. Life is really too short to remember to be angry all the time. We have other things to focus on and to give our energy to.